03 Into the sunset: Samyama, for salvation or doom

Samyama, for salvation or doom

We are on incredibly slippery terrain here. On one hand, it is incredibly easy to go too far and extinguish the natural, animal-instinctual impulses in all sorts of situations, and on the other hand it’s very easy to indulge yourself and allow this or that, justifying every descent into animality and permissiveness. Like (probably) everybody else who dealt with spirituality, I spent many years figuring out the right balance in those things, until at one point I reached a solution, which is truly shocking in its simplicity. You see, I decided that none of this really matters.

You see, it is completely irrelevant what you do, or not; what matters is whether it keeps you in the right spiritual state, that your vertical doesn’t collapse and that your spiritual core doesn’t become compromised. The sphere of activity is simply too complex to be able to classify actions into proper and improper, according to all possible criteria and categories, since their valuation is a dynamic thing, and that each moment, each situation is a universe of its own, with new rules and laws, and none of what you did yesterday, properly or improperly, is usable as a validation scheme for today.

This, of course, is not a philosophy that could be of use to the beginners, and I can already see the vast ocean of abuse that could follow from its application – every fool could justify all the bestialities from his personal Id with the concept of spontaneous spirituality, and if someone has a problem with that, he can go fuck himself. It is therefore necessary, before attempting excursions into spontaneity and easing the restrictions, to discipline one’s animal nature with some form of strict training. Here I don’t mean some trivial form of self-discipline, but difficult and demanding exercises of maintaining the meditative state during the waking hours and normal daily activities, which initially appears to be impossible, because the mechanisms of activity are so coarse and unrefined, they instantly take the beginner out of the meditative state. Initially, it is possible to integrate only the simplest forms of activity, and even that for mere seconds, where the first spoken word takes you out of meditation, because you lack the neural traces that would bind the meditative state and activity; those things function as successive and mutually exclusive states, where you must almost literally “rewire” your brain in order to make the meditation during activity possible. This is on one hand utterly simple, but at the other hand it’s also brutally demanding, and exactly because this demanding nature of the practice, as well as the subtlety and lack of fireworks in the result-end of the equation, the beginners often choose the path of least resistance and the methods that allow them to quickly emulate the results of demanding spiritual practice, but are a blind alley and a counterfeit of spirituality. In order to attain meaningful results with this technique, you will need months of constant practice – half a year is expected – and even then, you should not expect miracles, but only to get quite close to complete removal of the time delay between reaching the spiritual state and the ability to funnel it into thoughts, words and actions. Only after multiple years of practice can you expect complete transparency in normal situations.

It’s therefore a simple and straightforward matter, there are no complicated exotic techniques involved. You just need to keep yourself in a meditative state while you act, and retry immediately after each failure. If you manage to act without breaking your meditative state, it was a correct reflection of your spiritual vertical. Since the thing is difficult to do, the results won’t be something you will be able to brag about in front of other “spiritual seekers”, so this technique is for obvious reasons avoided by cultists and others who see the spiritual practice as a form of social advancement.

If “meditative state” is too abstract a term for you, you need to learn that first. This is not a beginner’s course in spirituality. In fact, I assume the audience to have a couple of years of serious meditative practice under their belt. However, even if that’s not the case, there are ways in which this method can be of use – it will suffice to find a point where you are content with yourself, the point of personal dignity and balance, and just don’t do things that would compromise your personal balance and dignity. Again, it sounds simple, until you actually try it, but again we come to what I keep repeating, that yoga is neither a sport nor some kind of fuckery, but a very fundamental way of organizing one’s life around the deepest, most profound states of consciousness that you can grasp, and grow from that point onwards. If yoga is merely a separate drawer in your metaphorical cupboard, with separate content, then such practice will produce no value. Yoga cannot exist in the context where yoga, karate, programming and photography exist as separate preoccupation; yoga is the foundation, and karate, programming and photography are things that can be practiced in yogic or non-yogic manner. Yoga is the bond between soul and action. It’s not something that can be set aside and practiced for half an hour every day. Such practice is worthless. Yoga is a way in which you do all other things, and it is, by definition, the process of transformation of your fundamental, basic approach to everything else in life.

We now encounter possibly the most serious problem, which I hinted at earlier, when I mentioned the inherent spiritual weakness of the practitioner as a significant problem. You see, the problem with conveying the spiritual state into physical activity is that it assumes that you are a being with a healthy spiritual core. If Satan conveyed his spiritual state into action perfectly, you will end up with perfectly satanic action. So, we are dealing with the GIGO principle – garbage in, garbage out. You can’t have activity that’s on the greater level of purity and sophistication than that of your soul. If your soul is shit, your correctly performed action will be good for nothing more than filling the sewers.

Don’t think I hadn’t considered this possibility – oh yeah, if one’s soul is shit, just transform it into a ray of divine light. If only it were that simple. I did come up with an answer, but you won’t like that one. You see, I concluded that the soul, basically the central karmic mass that incarnates into the body, is a product of millions, if not billions of years of gradual and painstakingly slow karmic aggregation and increase in complexity of the spiritual structures. If you spent a billion years turning yourself into shit, it’s illusory to expect that a magic wand of some spiritual technique will turn you into a ray of sunshine. It just doesn’t work like that. So, I concluded that the only meaningful thing to do is to profile the audience and simply shoo away the persons who are dark, corrupt and satanic, turn them into dedicated enemies so that they never could even consider a yogic practice and become a serious problem, and teach yoga only to the persons who incarnate really subtle energies, without significant participation of anything that would even remotely stink of evil. If there’s anything in this world that exists in excessive amounts, it’s the evil souls, and I really don’t need to teach those how to become super-demons trained in the spiritual equivalent of martial arts. Yeah, that’s a wonderful idea, let’s try it. Not. So, I intentionally function in a way that will irk those beyond belief and whack them out of balance, and if possible, completely psychically destroy them. Yes, I intentionally and deliberately destroy a certain profile of souls, and I see it as a supremely useful form of activity, at least as useful as teaching great souls how to attain perfection in their actions. Spiritual decomposition and destruction of demons to the point of karmic dissociation is a praiseworthy goal, because it permanently puts them out of circulation and thus removes one of the leading causes of evil in the world. The primary cause of evil in the world are neither disease nor earthquakes nor floods, but demonic humans who are under the power and control of Satan. The sooner they are put out of commission, the better for everyone else.

How does this dovetail with the things like ahimsa and love for all beings, you will ask? Well it doesn’t; I couldn’t care less for neither of those things, the way I don’t care what I’ll have for lunch as long as it is nutritious and tastes good. I see things in a more generalized way, not on the level of beings, but on the level of fundamental spiritual states embodied by the beings. Opposite to what’s common in the “spiritual circles”, I don’t see a being as an eternal given, colored by certain qualities that are to be ignored in one’s approach if he is to be equal towards all.

What I am doing is seeing the sat-cit-ananda as the primordial given, and I see the individual beings as agglomerations of spiritual substance that more or less reflect this pre-existing perfection and bear its qualities, or oppose them. All my devotion and loyalty, and, if we’ll succumb to the level of poetry, love, belong to brahman, who is sat-cit-ananda. My relationship with the beings is a total, absolute reflection of their relationship with sat-cit-ananda. If a being is in love with brahman, meditates on him, bears its qualities throughout life, strives to dive into him deeper, drink more of him and live him in the world, I worship this being and devote my life to his service. If, however, a being dedicates his life to opposing the qualities of brahman in everything he sees and is able to reach, this being is my enemy and I will crush him underfoot like a bug, not only without the slightest feeling of guilt, but with great dedication, care, attention and pleasure. To destroy such vermin is a great goodness, and their life is a great evil. I intentionally lure them into committing fatally sinful actions that will utterly destroy them, to the point of nothing remaining, and quarter would neither be sought, nor given.

Someone will now ask whether I intentionally and deliberately decided to provide some with an instrument of enlightenment, while provoking the others into ruining themselves, my answer will surprisingly be “no”. I just blindly followed the lead from “above”, from the Gods who had sent me here and who in fact control my fate. When I first understood that they don’t see the universal enlightenment of beings as a worthy goal, or any kind of goal for that matter, but force beings into making the final and conclusive choices through which they will profile themselves for good or evil, with the extreme destinations in either godhood or sharing the doom of Satan, my surprise was great, and I spent a long time checking myself for the possible error in interpretation, but the result was not only conclusive, but also firm as a rock. Apparently, the guys “up there” see it as a priority to clear the air, and end the situation where various vile and dark fucks drag their pathetic selves across this world like stink across bad water, excusing themselves repeatedly with ignorance, misunderstanding, lack of opportunity for the real and final choice, “because I couldn’t choose against God because I never saw a pure enough form of God, and since I love God so much I was always so annoyed with those bad blasphemous impurities, please give me another chance, if I really saw the pure form of God I would surely recognize Him and choose Him” – you get the picture. Since final dissolution is quite a permanent thing and there must be no possibility of mistake, apparently a next chance was an easy thing to get if you knew the right tricks.

Since those creatures are apparently experts in avoiding punishment, and this world is a weird place with an even weirder law-set, the result was basically that an enormous number of demonic souls happened to end up here, becoming progressively more concentrated in the population with the passage of time, as well as attaining greater concert and coherence, and, for all intents and purposes, harmony with the designs of Satan. It is obvious that a great part of their existence was devoted to making good people’s lives difficult, as well as devising various snares, illusions, and deceptions to be put in circulation here, so that nobody could have a chance to get out, they would have the eternal power and authority, and basically they would shit such an enormous turd that not even God could clean it. Also, an increasing number of bodies was filled with “blanks”, and are essentially soulless entities that reflect only the global background astral field. With the exponential population growth, this was not unexpected.

This probably dragged on for thousands, if not millions of years, until it reached a point where the guys “up there” decided to put an end to this party, in ways that reflect both their wisdom and cold anger.

What’s my role in this? The real question is, who am I? Guess rightly, and the gates of salvation open. Guess wrongly, and the gates of doom open.