Some thoughts on various things

Recently my son asked me whether we can get out of the mode where we’re prepared for an immediate disaster, basically whether he can take the laptop out of the evacuation backpack. I thought about it and said this: “The last few times I went out for a walk, 2 out of 3 times I ended up going to a big sports/outdoors store and I always came home with a few additional pieces of survival/emergency preparedness gear. I bought several thermally insulated stainless steel water bottles, a fixed blade hunting knife, cordage, inox cups, a spare backpack, gas-powered cooker, several LED battery lights and similar stuff. I didn’t really intend to, I did it on autopilot, without planning or thinking about it, the way a squirrel collects nuts on instinct. Also, you’ve seen me collect gold and silver. So, you tell me, if you see a squirrel collecting nuts in a hurry, on instinct, how likely do you think it is that spring is coming?”

No, I don’t know why I’m doing it, and I don’t know what’s coming, but I’m a squirrel collecting nuts and acorns to put in various holes in trees, and feeling good when I’m doing it, and it basically does itself on autopilot, I’m not having an intellectual plan of any kind, and if you asked me, I would tell you that for most probable crisis-types, this kind of emergency preparedness is futile and meaningless, but it’s something that a physical body does in response to a certain type of subconscious premonition. So, that’s what’s been going on lately, and I didn’t write anything here because I didn’t really know what to say. Everything I said before still stands, and I have no real updates, other than that my body is quite badly damaged by the coronavirus; I seem to have permanently lost a significant portion of my lung capacity so I get winded much sooner during any kind of exercise, which aggravates my excessive weight problem which always arises during the winter, when I can’t go out for long walks and just sit at home, eating the quantities of food I got accustomed to during the high-activity periods, and this time “winter” just got extended by a few months. A combination of excessive weight and low oxygenation equals strained heart, which is not good. All in all, I’m not in the best of conditions and I am trying to fix it with a fast/diet, with limited success due to the fact that everything that’s actually effective in reducing weight is also putting my brain first in low-sugar mode, and then in keto mode, both of which are impairing or outright disabling my spiritual abilities, which is something I am not willing to put up with.

Gold has been steadily rising, and silver was behaving excessively poorly, which is contrary to all expectations that are to be made based on the laws of supply and demand, so it’s obvious that the market is controlled, but that doesn’t tell us by whom, for what reasons and to what end. Before the weekend, silver started slightly outperforming gold, but the ratio between them is still over 100, which is historically unprecedented in how bad it is. One could say that it’s a good time to buy silver, but that is based on the assumption that silver is going to rise, and/or that gold is going to stagnate or drop, but this is all based on the rationale that silver is going to re-assume its historical role of a secondary monetary metal. Having in mind that historically silver was a secondary monetary metal only because it was impractical to mint gold coins of such low value for daily trade, and today we can use electronic purchasing systems to settle trade in very small fractions without any additional difficulty, this assumption is highly dubious. In fact, considering how gold was recently re-instated as a class 1 security, and nothing of the sort is even in the cards for silver, gold remains a sure thing, with an almost certain further growth until the amount of gold stored in the central banks reaches at least 40% of the value of the overall monetary emission. Silver, however, remains a highly speculative investment and I’m very glad I kept my investment in silver limited to a lower percentage. I am, however, happy to have it, just in case it starts behaving like a new Bitcoin, which it might, but I can’t give you the probability because I don’t know all the factors involved.

Also, Biljana got the new 16” Macbook pro, and I of course tried it and was mostly underwhelmed, because it felt almost completely identical to my mid-2015 15” model, which is the highest praise I can give a laptop, essentially saying it’s great and if my 15” died I would buy it without reservations, other than the price. The new GPU is excellent, leagues better than anything Apple put in their laptops before. I ran Valley benchmark on it in 1600p on ultra and it ran perfectly, in high frame rates, and the laptop managed to cool itself normally once it ramped up the fans, stabilizing around 75°C. This essentially makes it a capable gaming laptop, in a pinch. The problems are the USB-C charging without any external indication that the battery is full, no magsafe, no legacy ports, no upgradability, and the price is obscenely high here in Croatia, with 25% VAT on top of higher European prices and stuff. To calculate in hard currency, the price here was two ounces of gold, but since I bought gold instead of the laptop while gold was much cheaper, and the laptop remained at the same price as before, I can almost talk myself into believing that I saved money buying it now instead of earlier, although I know I’m deceiving myself. 😊 Anyway, that was the only thing I bought recently that doesn’t fall into the category of “gathering nuts and acorns”, and my squirrel-self is not happy about it and wants to return to gathering gold coins and survival thingies as soon as money allows. 😊

And of course, with the ominous feeling of impending disaster on the horizon, a vacation on Hvar is postponed indefinitely.

Some fun

Having nothing more important to do, I’ve been learning the Nürburgring tourist track on the simulator.

The problem is, the pedals keep sliding on the floor, which does not contribute to accurate timing. 🙂 I drove the Audi this time instead of the BMW, they are very similar in almost everything, other than Audi wiggling and drifting a bit on the limit allowing you to save the situation sometimes, while the BMW just loses the tail and spins out.

Talking about the BMW, I repeated the same laptime with it:

I can’t seem to beat that time despite the fact that both cars could go faster; it’s just that I lose time on the mistakes that are partly due to the fact that the force of pressing the brake pedal actually moves the pedals on the floor and that messes everything up, and since I keep it close to the limit, imprecision during braking results in errors. The other cause of errors is me sucking. 🙂

OK, I think I memorized the track enough not to crash due to forgetting that bend; let’s speed this up:

And some fun in heavy fog:

My times are actually improving, even with the fog as a test of memory.

I actually shaved more than 10 seconds off my best time with the BMW:

Democracy in heaven

There’s an expectation on the physical plane that individual beings have rights and privileges and legality of anything needs to be based on at least acknowledgment of that principle, through majority rule, if not outright consensus.

There is no such thing in “heaven”, or however you might call the higher planes of existence. The concept of everyone having equal rights is not only something that would be seen as strange, it would be seen as outright blasphemous. I will explain why.

You see, the physical plane creates a particular illusion, that existence is defined by the physical body. This creates an assumption that every-body has rights, and justice means equality of rights for all. However, if you remove the physical body, what remains can contradict this appearance greatly. Remove one body, and you have a whirl of energy, barely maintaining continuity of existence and consciousness.  Remove another body, you have a well defined “soul” with a complex history and deep consciousness. How do you even think about equality when the entire existence contradicts this concept?

Well, there actually is something similar. There is democracy in heaven. There can be a “vote”. It’s just that it’s not the “souls” that vote, because this is an arbitrary concept, since the “souls” can break apart or aggregate into more sophisticated structures. No, it’s the individual kalapas, the “particles of consciousness”, that “vote”. The more kalapas aggregate in a structure, the more value it has, because, for all intents and purposes, greater aggregation of kalapas into greater density-substances makes something “more of God” than something else. An astral bug is God to a very small degree. A Divine being that is crystallized light and consciousness is God to a much greater degree. That’s the closest I can get to describing it using human language, but it’s not very difficult to understand how for instance Jesus would be “more God” than a saint, a saint would be “more God” than a sinful soul, and a sinful soul would be “more God” than a soul so rudimentary it can barely maintain a continuity of individual consciousness.

Essentially, the kalapas “vote” by “choosing” to aggregate or to disperse, if you want to put it that way, and if something contains more kalapas it has more “rights”. It’s more complicated than that, because privileges can exist separately from the defining core of one’s being, but basically, if you meet a Divine being, saying “who gave you the right to judge me” might not be the smartest thing.

The concept of aggregation of kalapas forming souls is foreign to Christianity, but it’s commonly understood in Buddhism and if you think about it, it explains things much better than “God made souls to be different”. Well, yeah, you can put it that way, but aggregation of kalapas is how that happened, and you’re not an innocent victim of God’s whims, because your structure is a result of your own personal choices. For all intents and purposes, you created yourself by relating to everything else and defining yourself against God.

This means that the structure of authority in Heaven has nothing to do with democracy or “human rights”. It has more to do with “dignitas”, as the Romans would frame it. You have dignity that emanates from your being and is proportional to your spiritual magnitude. If you reduced your dignity by making evil choices, you might not be worth much and in fact your being might not last. On the other hand, if you made virtuous choices, if you always chose God before all other things and your actions reflected those choices, your dignity might be great, and will automatically grant you respect, privileges and, in fact, something akin to “rank”. Other beings might consult with you, your opinion will be sought and respected, and your will might have weight in all kinds of decision-making. It’s basically aristocracy, the rule of the virtuous, only for real. If you find yourself in a position where you lack personal dignity, and you act arrogantly as you were taught to act on Earth, calling upon your “rights” and questioning the “right” of others to pass judgement upon you, meat grinder might go brrrrrrrr.

And yes, as a postscriptum, lots of “dignitas” equals “imperium”, to keep it within the Roman analogy. Although, “imperium” is not something automatic that emanates from the soul-structure, it is a special thing that is granted, let’s say Divine Authority, literally the power of God or power sanctified by God, although I’m not happy with the formulation because it’s too mundane and sounds arbitrary, while it is everything but. It’s total and absolute.

An update

Remember a year ago, when I first started talking about gold? Let’s see the snapshot of the gold price at that time:

That was then. This is now:

Price difference +10000 €/kg.

Also, there’s that other difference: at that time I was recommending that you prepare for a medium-level disaster which is highly likely going to precede the complete SHTF scenario and a civilization-ending event. Well, about that medium-level disaster: we’re there. Do my recommendations still hold? Yes and no. This means, if you followed them in time, good for you, you still have money now. Is it still time to buy gold? Well, if you had a 1kg equivalent of gold in savings a year ago, and you had it in euros and didn’t convert to metal, you now have 750g, which is one 250g gold bar less. If you wait longer, you’ll still have the same number in euros, but it will probably buy a bag of rice. So yes, the best year to buy gold was 2005. If you didn’t do it then, late 2018 was good. If you didn’t do it in 2018, or a year ago when you thought I’d gone crazy because I started talking about hoarding gold ASAP, well, now you’re fucked and all your options are weak. You already lost a quarter of your liquid assets, if you had any, and now you’re forced to choose between buying gold at the all-time high, during a scarcity situation that caused an additional price hike, and with reduced availability, or you can wait and hope everything will be great somehow and you’ll be able to buy a Krugerrand for 350€ like you could in 2005. If you don’t have savings, now is actually a good time to have cash, because we’re not preparing for a crisis any more, we’re in the middle of one. Now is the time to have liquidity if you have to stock up on food, or pay the bills.

Just remember: when I originally issued warnings, everything seemed to be fine and my warning seemed crazy. Now that it sounds great in hindsight, you are no longer in a position to do anything about it. That might apply to other things, as well, so yeah.