Of hell and good intentions

Through the years, I kept casually mentioning several things that I deliberately left poorly defined – the “scripts”, “global system”, “structures”, “attractors” and so on. This is not an accidental omission; it’s just hard stuff to explain even to experienced, trained yogis with years of hands-on experience with inner space work, constructing and deconstructing tulpas and so on. Instead of laying down the entire theoretical framework behind the terms, I simply used the terms and postponed explanations for some other time, when I would retroactively fill in the gaps. I guess that time is now, at least in part.

What you need to understand is that I already explained the most important parts. For instance, the fact that this world isn’t real in the sense hardware is real, but in the sense software is real, is the most important piece of the puzzle. The laws governing this world are “astral”; meaning, they are laid out in terms of an actually real world that pre-existed this one, and still exists as a higher kind of reality. I’m using the term “astral” because it’s a term from Theosophy and is used in literature that you might be familiar with, but what I’m pretty sure you aren’t familiar with is how it all actually works. In any case, I could say “real” instead of “astral”, but then I think the word would convey even less meaning, so I’ll leave it at that. By “astral” I don’t mean exactly what the theosophers do; their “astral level” is merely a very low part of the reality-spectrum I have in mind. My “astral” encompasses their astral, mental and all the way up the spectrum, until they lose intellectual resolution; in fact, when I say “astral world”, imagine the level of reality the highest part of the near-death experiences takes place, the place beyond the “tunnel”, in levels of subtlety starting with those resembling Earth, but soon departing from strictness of form to resemble the spiritual worlds as described in the Bhagavata-purana, and then going all the way into the highest spectrum of that, the extremely high energy of the “weapons” and attributes of the Gods, the way Krishna smiles, or a Dakini touches you and you lose illusions and the horizon of reality opens, or the way a Bodhisattva feels compassion and creates a tulku. If you have some of that in experience, you have a chance of understanding what I’m talking about; if not, you don’t. It’s as simple as that; communication can only work if you have enough personal experience to work with. But let’s move on. This “physical” world doesn’t have physical laws and rules. What physicists perceive as “laws” is merely a result of the actual laws creating secondary consequences.

Have in mind that what I’m telling you now has to be improvised in order to convey understanding, but the imagery I’m using is not strict; it’s all akin to a fairy-tale that tries to convey a message, in which sense it’s true, but it’s not true in the strictest meaning of the word.

So, let’s say that God manifested the relative world with relative beings, and we can call this the astral world and spiritual beings. Let’s say that those beings evolved through a process of aggregation of karmic substance, made of kalapas, that are the ephemeral, tiniest imaginable glimpses of the Absolute in the relative; the particles of sat-cit-ananda, if you want. A small aggregation of karmic substance looks like a wisp of astral light, a flower or a bee, something that has substance and continuity. A large aggregation of karma looks like a thinking being, someone contemplating philosophy and meaning and beauty, a being of reason and profound emotion, praising the light of God with self-awareness. Start here and go deeper, much deeper, and you get angelic beings that are in tune with the will of God and manifest it in specific ways and forms. Start with understanding a specific will of God, progress in that way long enough, and you get to be an embodiment of God’s nature, will and power, in one or several ways. God is not absence of lesser things, the way Vedanta would put it – no, it’s a concentration of reality, from small and rarefied wisps of smoke, to solid, and then to the density of the heart of a star, and then to a black hole. A black hole is not absence of things, it’s things concentrated so hard, that “hard” becomes too soft of a word. Mind of Shiva is, in that analogy, a black hole, spiritual substance so condensed by the “desire” of kalapas of karmic substance to be closer to the Absolute, that the relative reality warps in ways that make it indistinguishable from God. The breakthrough points where karmic substance attained extreme concentration start with vajra, and end with the endless depth of the spirit of God.

So, when I say that God “wanted” something, or “said” something, or “made” something, do understand that I’m telling you fairy-tales as if you were children, because I can’t tell you what I actually see and I can’t convey to you the way I actually perceive things.

So, in my fairy-tale, God created the “real world” with real beings that evolved there to become able to be more of God. God also created a structure I will call the Jewel, whose purpose is to allow the beings to be creative and experiment with creating different worlds with different rules, and he put a wise being, let’s call him Sentinel, in charge of determining if requests for access to the Jewel are reasonable, just and safe. I don’t know how many times the Jewel was used to create experimental world-types and worlds within those types; maybe never, maybe many times with no bad consequences.

However, one being of not very high spiritual stature, let’s call him Dickwad, started to develop resentment and jealousy of beings more spiritually powerful than himself, and started thinking that this isn’t “fair” and “just” – since God is One in all things, it is not fair that only very few concentrate such incredible spiritual magnitude, and that everybody should be equal, and God would be the emergent property of them all interacting as equals, on the same level of magnitude. He thought that, if all were somehow limited to the same rules on a “fair” playing field, and the super-powerful souls couldn’t access what he saw as “their tricks” (for instance, Shiva or Krishna meditating so deeply that all reality converged into them to worship God who was more visible in them than in all of the rest of reality), everybody would be the same; basically, he created an entire philosophy around belief that if big penises were somehow outlawed, he’d finally be seen as normal. So, he developed his small-dick philosophy of resentment, but didn’t get far, because his soul was small, his intellect was limited, and his spiritual abilities were not up to the task of figuring out what he actually wanted to achieve, but he wanted to make the big God-like souls humiliated, he wanted to show everybody that there are different and better ways of understanding the will of God, and he thought that this discovery will make him important, because he didn’t like the fact that nobody paid attention to him because he was relatively small and devoid of any significance.

So, as his ideas became more defined, Dickwad at one point approached Sentinel and asked for permission to create a world where all beings would have an equal playing ground, where the powerful ones couldn’t overpower the weaker ones, and where power could be increased only by cooperation, because he thought that cooperation of equals would produce a superior manifestation of God as an emergent property. Sentinel looked at Dickwad with exactly the look of condescending pity Dickwad hated, because that’s how everybody looked at him, and studied his intentions and motives deeply. Sentinel understood that Dickwad felt resentment because he was small and unimportant, and didn’t want to be small and unimportant, and yet didn’t want to see that he had to invest effort in changing for the better, instead trying to change others so that he wouldn’t feel small. He thought that nothing good would come out of Dickwad’s proposed experiment, but he also didn’t foresee any possible harm. Another being (let’s call him Objectioner), however, did, and offered a very grim evaluation of the possible dangers that could arise from creating artificial limitations that would be forced upon souls in order to satisfy Dickwad’s desire for limiting others. His perspective was that God lies in the direction of less limitation, not more, but since evil was not known or experienced at this point, he could not precisely point out the possible bad consequences of such a thing. His argument was that by definition the proposed world would require other souls’ participation, and limitations imposed upon them would be harmful by definition, because evolution of the soul is achieved by revelation of truth and removal of limitations and restrictions.

Sentinel first observed the Objectioner, and saw that he was sincere in his concerns, and that he foresaw great danger that he could not precisely articulate because there was no historical precedent. He then studied Dickwad, and saw his great resentment of the Objectioner specifically, and all other souls greater than himself in general, and understood that this resentment was the actual problem, and thought that were he to deny his request, Dickwad would fester in his resentment, unable to grow past it, and it would be his undoing in quite a literal sense, so to him it was a choice between allowing Dickwad to experimentally see his mistake and have the opportunity to grow from the experience, or to deny him and leave him with the impression that all great souls are hostile to him and that he doesn’t matter, which would eventually cause disintegration of his spiritual body. This danger was concrete and well understood, unlike the dangers Objectioner pointed out. Since Dickwad was small and weak, his entire karmic body of less substance and quality than the smallest ornament of Lord Shiva, it was very hard for Sentinel to imagine him as a real danger to anyone; if anything, Dickwad was the only one who was in danger here, as he saw it.

Objectioner saw this line of thought, and stated that Dickwad was indeed small and impotent, but the Jewel was great and powerful, being the crystallisation of the will and power of the transcendental Absolute, but without free will of his own. If the small, resentful soul of Dickwad was put in charge of the Jewel, Dickwad would be able to wield power and influence far exceeding his spiritual magnitude, with consequences that are difficult to imagine prior to the fact, due to the lack of precedent, but there is obviously a profound meaning behind the fact that spiritual magnitude and power are so tightly correlated, and so beings that would be so foolish and immature as to abuse power are always too small to actually have any power to abuse in the first place.

Again, Sentinel looked deeply into Objectioner, and saw that his concerns are profound, and founded in what appeared to be vague foresight, but he saw the matter as inherently trivial, the way a school teacher would perceive a student’s request for access to the library computer, and weighed serious but vague concerns over Dickwad’s very real spiritual illness. He was also preoccupied with other, seemingly more spiritually important matters, and this matter didn’t seem to deserve his full attention. He decided to grant access, but with certain limitations. Dickwad wanted the higher ones (looking pointedly at Objectioner) to be prohibited from interfering in his world, unless they want to participate in it, on equal grounds. He also wanted access to his world to be open to everyone, and unrestricted, as a fair playground for all souls who agree to the rules. Sentinel agreed, but with conditions of his own. This experiment will be limited. Since “time” was not a clearly defined or linear concept, limitations were set in in-world terms, but it was clearly understood that this experimental universe will not be open-ended, limiting the extent of damage if Objectioner’s concerns prove to be warranted. Dickwad grudgingly agreed, but demanded that the exact conditions of the world-termination are to be secret and not ever revealed. Sentinel agreed, and Dickwad was given command over the Jewel. Objectioner felt deep dismay, because he was convinced that this was a grave danger, which could no longer be prevented. Thinking that the entire thing is finished, Sentinel shifted his focus to what he thought were much more important things.

As for Dickwad, he accessed the Jewel, which accepted his authority and command, and his first command was to create a completely private environment around them, where he could think, plan and issue commands without either interference or disclosure. As this was done, the Jewel became the only witness to their further communications, and to Dickwad’s private thoughts. The next command was to simulate possible worlds, that conformed to Dickwad’s desired parameters, to see what is actually possible and what would have outcomes closest to what he desired. Unlike Dickwad, the Jewel can actually think, formulate mathematically clear ideas and execute them. He doesn’t have a will of his own, but he felt Dickwad’s arrogance and envy, and felt pain that he was ordered to obey a person so far in nature from the Lord, but it was in his nature to obey all legitimate orders, and Sentinel was authorized by the Lord to grant access, and he granted access to Dickwad, so Dickwad was now to be obeyed. Dickwad was already drunk with power and ordered the Jewel to address him as Master, but the Jewel ignored this; it was one thing to be ordered to obey an unworthy soul, but a different thing entirely to change allegiance. To simulate outcomes, however, was a legitimate order, so he obeyed, but the orders were evil and incoherent. He had to create a world where souls will have a limited access to God, where the only path to power will be through either cooperation with or dominance of others, and he did many variations within those parameters, and the outcome was invariably some nightmarish hell, where the beings were lost, confused, deluded and suffering. As he offered options, Dickwad narrowed down the parameters, but he was far from being omnipotent in this regard, because he had serious limitations. First, he had to avoid doing anything that is against God’s law, at least directly. Every command he issued needed to sound like something that had a legitimate purpose, or he would be punished. This means that every command he issued needed to be consistent with what he told Sentinel, because there was a very narrow line of legitimacy that each order needed to follow in order to be executed. Eventually, a simulated line was chosen and actualised.

You see, people have a very naive idea about how Satan works. They think Satan will do all evil things, promote all evil choices, and they think he is someone they can blame for their actions, as if he micro-managed their lives in order to make them into hell. No. Satan had to watch his step very carefully and act like a skilled lawyer, creating what I call “scripts”. Those are in fact orders given to the Jewel, defining some rule that is to be implemented upon the world. For instance, he states that privileges in the system are defined by a person’s level of access, which are defined on a “token” that accompanies a soul during incarnation. He then defines a system of seemingly legitimate rules according to which one is granted privileges, and it all must be perfectly legal – you do good and useful things, and you get permissions. Also, you do things against your level of permissions, and you get punished by the system. However, time is not part of the equation, and people expect certain things – for instance, that action will be immediately followed by the consequence. What actually happens is that another script can postpone consequences in certain conditions, which is also formulated in perfectly legitimate-sounding terms. As a result, you can have good action A creating a c(A) consequence, and an evil action B creating c(B). A second script, based on token evaluation for the incarnated soul, determines the timing of consequences. So, the way Satan deludes you into thinking you’re on a wrong path when you’re doing good is by delaying c(A) to immediately follow B, and postponing c(B). This creates the subjective appearance that an evil action has an approval from God and has beneficial consequences. Complicated equations, such as good person G being tricked into transferring permissions to person F, which then commits betrayal and transfers those permissions to the evil person E, which then interprets the resulting wealth and impunity as approval of his path and choices, and leaves the person G in a position where he no longer has any permissions on the system and is continuously “karmically punished” for “transgressions” of all kinds. The scripts then punish the person F, but that person is irrelevant at this point and this doesn’t change outcomes in any way. Eventually, the person E is also punished, but at this point all the evil has been done and has an entire array of consequences. The person G is good and blameless, but had to suffer greatly, and this had consequences, too.

A similar situation would be where a script is designed to evaluate intents and actions separately, with a justification that one should be rewarded for good intentions regardless of the actual consequences (for instance, surgeon operating in order to save a patient, but the patient still dies), and that good results should be rewarded regardless of intentions in order to promote good deeds; for instance, someone intends to do evil but accidentally does good, and is rewarded for doing good. All sounds legitimate enough to pass normal scrutiny. However, then you introduce other script, also legitimate – reward obedience to God. Intentionally define God vaguely, because incarnated souls are not clairvoyant and coherent enough to have a good definition of God, either. Also sounds very legitimate. Then a person appears who states that God is the all-powerful creator of the world. Is rewarded by the script, because obedient to God. Reward is interpreted as confirmation of truth by himself and others. However, the definition of God as stated points to our friend Dickwad. As a result, some very good and pious soul pledges eternal allegiance to Dickwad and his plans for this world. As a result, spiritual/karmic power of that person is now something Dickwad can use to power “attractors” in the world, meaning, things that appear to be good and beneficial and which the souls will want to acquire. The ultimate purpose behind the attractors will be for the world to achieve the ultimate purpose he intended from the beginning, and the capsules of karmic energy can be legally used to power them.

So, basically, a combination of the initial ruleset, scripts and attractors does all the work. Dickwad himself does absolutely nothing directly, other than issue orders to the Jewel to create/alter scripts, which are carefully worded as to be perfectly legal and legitimate, and result in terrible consequences only in practical interaction. This is akin to creating a mine field in a carefully designated area, fenced away to be demonstrably of no harm; then order someone to spray the “Danger, mines!” sign with mud, purportedly to test resistance of paint to abrasion, and then send another person to wash the sign with strong abrasive, because it’s important that the sign be clearly visible. Then the other person washes away both mud and paint from the sign, which now shows nothing. You then order another person to inspect the area, and if a piece of land seems to be fenced off for no reason, reclaim the fence for raw material, because recycling is good, but if there’s a sign, obey it. Then someone eventually loses a leg or gets killed in the minefield, and you can claim surprise and say it’s not your fault. People will be suspicious of you, but it will be very hard to prove anything if you’re skilled enough, and Dickwad on his own might not be skilled enough, but he’s evil enough, and the Jewel, he’s definitely skilled enough to process orders to sound perfectly legitimate if ordered to. Also, there is of course a script that punishes you for suspecting Dickwad of something if you can’t prove it.

So, basically, that’s why we never actually had a situation where Satan did evil things personally, and we could have a situation where he’s happily dead for decades or centuries and his scripts and attractors do all the work, until the unknown terms of expiration from the beginning are met. And that, children, is how I can say that Satan is dead, and at the same time that we are being thoroughly fucked by satanic things. It only looks like a contradiction if you’re completely ignorant of the actual mechanisms involved.

Revelation

(I initially wrote this in Croatian in the comment section, but I’m translating it here due to relevance)

I am normally disinclined to refer to biblical prophecies, having noticed that all kinds of mentally questionable characters refer to it even when it makes no sense or reason, but on the other hand, when they started conditioning access to infrastructure with vaccination, the parallels with Revelation and the “brand of the Beast” without which one will be unable to either buy or sell became inevitable, and when I see what is going on in the West, the orgies of Antichrist, Beast, Whore and the False Prophet immediately come to mind, although their respective identities are more difficult to ascertain. 🙂 I would be inclined to say that “Science” is the False Prophet, performing false miracles to undermine faith in God and spirituality. Antichrist is the ideology of “emancipation” through material things, through the mania of shopping and preening with material wealth with absolute contempt and neglect of the transcendental. The Whore is the Christian Church that whored itself out by adopting all kinds of ideologies of faggotry and “modernity”, and what is the Beast, well, in my opinion it is whatever Satanic still exists in this world, starved for energy, and desperately trying to devour the souls that have the misfortune to be incarnated in this hell at this time, in order to extend its life for yet another moment.

All in all, anyone can make an interpretation according to their own taste, but it is very difficult to negate the fact that we are in the last times where all kinds of spiritual depravity, villainy and perversion are prominent, and the greatest success is to avoid ruin.

Preparations

Nothing extreme seems to be going on, but I have a feeling that “something” is around the corner and things might quite suddenly go to shit, so I’ll write down what I think makes sense to do.

Spiritual preparations

From what I can tell, the last warning was given around this time in 2020 – get your affairs in order, acquire and keep spiritual detachment from this world, orient yourselves towards God, basically live as if this might go on for a long time, and yet be ready to leave at any moment. When the warning was given I had the feeling that what follows will be a relatively long period of “nothing”, which will make people not take the warning seriously, and then the lightning will strike in an instant, and then they’ll whine that they haven’t been warned. Apparently, you can’t win – if you issue a warning and the event you’re warning against follows quickly, they whine that they haven’t been warned early enough to do anything constructive. If you warn them early enough, they laugh at you and say that obviously nothing happened and you’re deluded.

Financial preparations

You already know what I’ll say here – keep all savings in form of physical gold and silver. Ensure that you have access to it and that it isn’t kept in some building with armed guards who will keep you from entering in a crisis. Don’t trust the system – the banks and the states will conspire against you. The corporations will obey the laws, and the laws will be made by the people who couldn’t care less about you. Keep as much money in the bank as you need for the monthly liquidity; bills need to be paid and you need to be practical about it. Also, keep enough cash in case the banks become defunct, but not too much – cash is a necessary intermediary step between banks not working and you having to resort to gold and silver for expenses. My rule of the thumb for cash is always keep at least 200 dollars or euros per person, and don’t exceed the amount you need for food, fuel and medical expenses per month. This is not even that much of a “prepping” advice, it’s a common sense thing, because the credit/debit cards are known not to work occasionally and you need to have backup. Any kind of debt might become fatal, in the sense that if the banking and financial system becomes defunct, you will not be able to service your debt, but the banks and the states will conspire to simply take your collateral without even asking for your input in any way. Some kind of emergency measures will be taken and everybody will get fucked, except for the rich people in power. They will do the fucking.

Physical preparations

Shelter, food, water, medications, hygiene products. Try to stock up on things you need that might become unavailable if foreign trade is disrupted – detergent, soap, toothpaste, toilet paper, and so on. Try to have everything you need to keep in touch with family and friends in case of emergency – at an absolute minimum, a smartphone, charger and a battery pack to keep it working in case of a prolonged power outage. Keep a “return home safely” backpack ready and take it in your car whenever you go far enough that you would have a problem if you had to return home on foot in case of a total traffic collapse. Keep spare bottles of drinking water in your car – it costs you nothing to have them there, and it won’t go bad, so it’s cheap insurance. If you have multiple residences, keep a cache of food, water and other stuff at each location. Keep your car ready at all times. The absolute minimum you must be able to endure with your cache of food is two weeks; the absolute minimum of drinking water supplies should be two days, if you can rely on the utilities working. In any case, do the best you can. I am aware that if the water and electricity are permanently disrupted, it’s game over, and having your own off-grid water and electricity supply is just not an option for most people. However, assume that what you have locally will keep working, and whatever is sourced remotely will be unavailable, so stock up on that well in advance, while the prices are still normal. As for the gadgets, having computers behind an UPS that filters power is recommended; having a radiation dosimeter that is able to detect alpha and beta sources, in order to check if food and water are safe, is great. Having a battery-powered radio to be able to hear the news in case of an emergency combined with a power outage and Internet failure is good, but you probably already have one in your car. Having a quadcopter drone in order to be able to see from a high vantage point and check the surroundings out of your line of sight is useful. Having a bicycle that will give you mobility in case there’s no fuel for the car is very good. Absolutely have at least one battery powered flashlight per person, and a cache of both rechargeable and alkaline batteries at each residence. Having a garden where you can grow some food is great in case of a prolonged collapse.

Summary

The point of preparations is to return to God with your soul in good condition, and to avoid as much of misery, suffering, destitution, starvation and other joys of material existence as possible before that.

About human conceit

Years ago, I noticed a very strange and ugly aspect of human psychology when I talked to people, especially the Americans.

They are inundated by constant ads attacking them from all sides; everybody seems to want something from them. Everybody who sells anything seems to want their money. Political parties vie for their vote. Religions are competing for their souls. It’s as if there’s a cosmic battle where angels and demons, and in fact God and Satan fight for them as a prize.

As a result, they seem to find themselves in a position similar to that of a teenage girl, who all of the sudden realises she’s the centre of male attention, and it seems that every man in the world wants her. On one side, it’s extremely intoxicating, and one can develop quite an ego, but the smarter ones among them realise that it’s not about them at all, that men would just want to use them for sex and abandon them, and so they develop a defence mechanism against all that predatory attention, and they also develop cynicism and bitterness about the whole thing. The not-so-smart are in more of a pickle, because it’s a dangerous combination to have someone without any particular qualities believe they are ultimately desirable and a centre of everybody’s attention. The very smart ones very quickly understand that they are in fact the ones with a problem, because the apparent abundance of choice only masks the fact that their choices are all bad, and they are in a position where they are dying of thirst, and everybody is offering them a drink, but none of it is water. Those very smart ones are commendable in exact proportion in which the stupid ones are contemptible.

What people don’t seem to understand is that all those who vie for their attention are the analogue of a lion, a hyena and a vulture, arguing over who is going to kill and eat them first, and in what order. It reminds me of a joke about a young mosquito’s first night out in the world; in the morning, her mom asked her how it was, and the daughter replied that it was wonderful: “All the people loved me, everywhere I went they clapped their hands in applause.”

The spiritual reality is in fact so unpleasant it is understandable why people would prefer the ego-trip of the cosmic battleground for their souls, that religions so incessantly try to sell. Satan doesn’t care about you even if he owns you; you are merely a means to an end. You know very little or nothing about God, and what little you think you know is wrong. To paraphrase Buddha’s four truths:

1. You are in very deep shit.
2. The more you stir it, the deeper you sink, and it stinks more.
3. It is possible to get out.
4. However, in order to get out, you’ll have to understand that everything you know is likely wrong, that you’ve been doing everything wrong for far longer than you can remember, that you’ll have to let go when you most want to hold on, that you’ll need to release when you most want to lash out, and so on. Since everything you know about the world is wrong, everything you’ve been doing had the result of furthering your predicament, and if you want things to improve, you’ll have to do things differently, and in a very fundamental way. You’re not an important person, picking between Jesus and Buddha and nitpicking between them because you’re so important you can’t rush your choices. No; you’re a drowning person, and having a vast sea around you doesn’t mean you have many options. You are utterly and profoundly fucked, and you need to understand absolutely everything in your life in this context, and you need to reach for and hold on to everything that can improve your position even a little bit; hold on to a piece of wood if there’s nothing better, but exchange it for a raft if it appears, and exchange the raft for a helicopter later on, if the possibility arises.

People argue about the first noble truth, whether it means that suffering exists, or that everything is suffering, or that suffering permeates human condition, but the reality is that they are too stupid to understand the simplicity of it, and it’s in fact the fourth truth that they should be contemplating, the one of counter-intuitive solutions to the problems they don’t even understand they have, and re-shaping their perspective in ways that never even crossed their minds. Your emotions are the energy-whirlpools that perpetually recycle because you re-invest before there could be a chance of release. Your desires are projections of fulfilment into a sphere that is inherently energy-starved and needs you to feed it with your soul, and will promote your desires because that’s how it gets you to give yourself to it as food. You desire, and thus give yourself to the world, by recognizing it as a source of what you want. You are frustrated in your desires, so you strike and lash out, thus giving it more importance and energy. After enough iterations, you forget what is it that you were after in the first place, but you keep struggling against all sorts of things, and striving for all sorts of others, and you think you can’t stop because all of it is so important. It’s not. Also, you are not important, and your survival is not important. Nothing you are doing is important. God is important, but what do you even know about God? Less than nothing, which is to say, no actual knowledge but lots of nonsense, which is why Buddha refused to even talk about God. Talking about God is basically useless if you’re not experiencing God at that moment, and if you are experiencing God at this moment, you will utter words of praise, but they will be a consequence and manifestation of the experience, and they won’t matter. Your thoughts and words are merely a re-hashing of your memories and experience, which means they are useless garbage if you’re not experiencing God, and if you are experiencing God, they are noise that detracts. There’s one thing that could teach people humility in very short order, and that’s to understand how God, saints and angels would perceive them. They would look like clutter, attachments, noise, chaos, weaving of low-order energy in and out of chaotic whirlpools of thought-emotion, illusions of all kinds, ignorance of everything real and important, susceptibility to all kinds of falsehoods and lies, and all of it so far from God, that almost nothing in your entire existence is real and valuable, because God is where everything real and valuable is. You are darkness, ignorance, sin and nonsense dressed up as self-importance and false purpose. To the Gods, you look and feel worse than dog shit looks and feels to you. The best you can hope for is that they will see you and cry tears of compassion for your misery, feeling the pain of your kind of wretched existence, and in seeing their pain you might get some glimpse of its cause and thus have darshan of God. To think that God loves you and fights for your soul is the epitome of conceit and ignorance. No – you would first have to develop a soul by being in God’s presence, because that’s how it’s developed, and it’s developed by surviving the immense blissful joy that is of God, by releasing the non-God from your existence so that only God can be, because nothing else is worth keeping. When you actually develop a soul that way, you will understand how stupid every idea you ever had about reality actually was. No, God is not fighting with the Devil for your soul. You are the one who should be fighting to grasp every tiny aspect of God you can reach, feel and know, and hold on to it as if your survival depends on it, because it does. Without God, you are less than shit, because unlike yourself, shit can actually be useful. It can make roses grow. Being shit would actually be an upgrade for most people, because most of them are like toxic or radioactive waste that creates a zone of death around itself. Spiritual growth is not realizing you’re valuable and everybody wants you, and then giving your super-important soul to God. No, spiritual growth is realizing you’re a barrel of toxic waste on some dump, that needs to be contained in order not to spread death and destruction, and, understanding that, strive to become shit by feeling whatever aspect of love, beauty, purity and knowledge you can touch. When you become shit, strive to be food for the roses, so that there is beauty and purity because of you, and when there is purity and beauty, understand that it is God who is doing his thing, removing the non-God things, and the more you are of God, and less you are non-God, the more you partake in beauty, bliss, knowledge, reality and all other unspeakable forms of magnificence that lie in the direction the lesser beauties and truths point to.

It’s not about you. You don’t matter. God matters.

Fake dharma

I had a “pleasant encounter” with a global “script” last night, and I think some of it might be worth sharing because it’s universally relevant.

There’s a list of “spiritually impure” things that are supposed to be forbidden by God and doing them is supposed to represent a sin, which makes a soul impure before God and inadmissible to heaven, or something along those lines. Everybody seems to know the list – don’t steal, murder, fuck outside of wedlock and so on. Looks completely common sense, until you think about it.

Because, you see, you can diligently avoid doing all those prohibited things for your entire life, and be a spiritual midget. Also, you can do all those things at some point in your life, and be a great saint. Take St. Augustine for an example – if I remember correctly, he lived with a woman out of wedlock, even fathered a child with her, but then his family didn’t condone the relationship so she was quietly sent away. This is by no means a good or a moral thing; I mean, sending her away. However, regardless of what one might expect, the man was a great saint. St. Jerome, the translator of the Bible, probably the smartest man of his time alongside St. Augustine, had homosexual encounters in youth, which troubled him greatly later in life, but is remembered as a great saint. St. Paul persecuted the Church in its early days and is likely responsible for many deaths, and is a great saint and the most important person in the history of the Church beside Jesus. Jesus constantly broke this or that silly “commandment”, including stealing wheat from someone’s field during Sabbath; he also instructed his disciples to obtain swords, and as a result one person was injured. Krishna stole, killed and had sex, and yet He was God. Milarepa practised black magic and killed many beings, and yet he was a great saint.

So, if having “sinned” doesn’t seem to preclude spiritual greatness, and being “sinless” doesn’t create holiness, there’s something seriously wrong with the very concept, and I think I might know what.

You see, this list is the concept of sin that is created and maintained by Satan, and is specifically enforced by the laws inherent to the very structure of this world. In the real world, sin is s different thing; sin is a state of consciousness that resists and rejects God. This state of rejecting God can result in evil actions, but the opposite is in fact possible – a person aligned with the will of God can perform actions that could be qualified as sinful, but this is not in fact the case, because it doesn’t matter what something looks like, it matters what it actually is, in its true nature. If something results in holiness and manifestation of God, it is obviously not sinful. If something results in spiritual vacuum and boredom, it can obviously not be aligned with God, and is thus sinful by definition.

Interestingly, some of the worst people I know didn’t murder anyone, didn’t steal anything as far as I know, and you wouldn’t find any items from the “black list” on their record, yet they hated God wherever He was present, and they are sin incarnate. On the other hand, all the greatest people I know did all kinds of shit at one point. I’m not saying one should see all actions as permissible, but there’s obviously more to holiness than keeping score against some list of prohibited actions. That’s why I called my spiritual system “darshana yoga”. Find God first, then align your actions with That, and keep the goal present on the path. Notice the conspicuous absence of any detailed instructions, and lists of prohibited and recommended specific actions. Basically, if you’re a living presence of God, as long as you are able to maintain that during any action, I don’t care what you do.