It was the least intimidating gathering of high-ranking individuals she ever took part in. In fact, the relaxed men and women sitting in a lounge over a beverage looked everything but intimidating. And yet, when Zina introduced her to her parents; the young woman in her twenties and a polite, kind man in what appeared to be early thirties, who were introduced to her as Lady Shakti and Lord Shiva, it wasn’t intimidating. No, nothing of the sort. Neither was it frightening. What she felt looking at their eyes was something she didn’t expect to feel once she became a Goddess. She thought Zina the Love of God and her husband Buddha, the Teacher of the World, were the most impressive people she would ever have the honour of seeing. Now, however, meeting the “parents”, she fought the instinct of dropping to her knees and kissing their feet.

“You two are the Alpha”, she stuttered as she looked at the God-couple. “You are the Beginning, the Origin. You created Time, Space and Thought. To call the two of you ‘Gods’ feels like an act of disrespect. I feel like I could meditate on you for millions of years and just slowly absorb things that you are, and it would be the best possible use of my time. The hair on my head stands on end when I’m near you, so much that I probably look like a hedgehog”, she managed to smile, as she curtsied to the young couple.

“Be at ease, wise one”, Lady Shakti embraced the older woman, who felt as if she were hugging the primordial Light of God emanating from The One, and understood that it might be exactly the case.

“I am right, am I not?”, she asked them. “You actually are the Primordial Principles?”

“Psst!”, hushed Lord Shiva in a mock-conspiratorial voice, with a finger before his lips. “Don’t tell anyone”, and he hugged the incredibly impressed Goddess, who felt such honour in his presence, that she trembled like a leaf.

“So, how are your impressions so far, young Lady?”, a deceptively younger man asked, acting in such a kind, supportive way that it miraculously put her completely at ease.

“I found my husband, now that I didn’t have to fear being courted for my flesh alone, since I no longer have any”, she smiled back. “I don’t know how he wasn’t a God already, though, with his incredible virtues and wisdom”.

“I was waiting for you, Goddess”, Lord Azrael embraced her from behind and smiled. “I, too, am overjoyed to finally have joined the family in earnest”, he joked.

“You were always family, Azrael”, Zina smiled and hugged him, as the others nodded in assent.

“Speaking of which, allow me to introduce you to the others”, smiled Lord Shiva.

…

“You are the Omega”, the stunned woman couldn’t help staring at Lord Vishnu and his wife. “You are the Ultimate Manifestations, the Goal”, she bowed deeply, trembling like a young tree in the wind.

“Rise, Piercing Insight”, Lord Vishnu smilingly embraced her, as her Title changed, and she blushed so hard she looked like a radish.

“Now you know how the rest of us feel around these four”, joked Lord Azazel as he bowed to the Lady.

“I don’t think I will ever get used to it”, she curtsied to the God and smiled back.

“Nobody ever does”, the Mind of God smiled as she embraced her new sister.

“I am very sorry for your experience with my supposed followers”, Jesus bowed and felt quite embarrassed.

“No”, Hypatia waved her head decisively, as she curtsied to the Lord with great respect. “That mob was the same as the one that wanted to stone you in every village you preached in, and spat at you as you were whipped on your way to Golgotha”, she kissed his hand.

“You know about my life?”, Christ was taken aback.

“Of course. I taught mathematics and astronomy to many Christian students, and we talked about you and your life a lot. I probably know more about you than that supposedly Christian mob that tore my body to pieces. Had we been contemporaries, I would have followed you everywhere as one of your apostles. Lack of respect and admiration for your holy person never participated in the reasoning behind me not being a Christian. I merely conceptualised things in a different way that felt less constrained than what I perceived the Christians to be; their thinking was too formulaic for my liking, and yet, the other point of dispute I had with them, your resurrection and the afterlife, is where they proved to be decisively in the right, and I regret not believing them”, she mused. “However, the ease with which the bishop sicced his mob on me, and the hatred and cruelty which they displayed, showed that I was not entirely wrong to keep my distance from them, as they embraced beliefs that felt more Jewish than Christian in their essential nature”.

“Tell me, what do you think, how much did your gender play a role in how they treated you?”, asked Magdalena as she came to embrace her.

“There was definitely a certain glee in how they tore my clothes off and tried to strip me of my dignity as they were killing me”, she nodded. “Part of it was definitely vindictiveness and desire to punish a woman for daring to be, I don’t know even what”, she shrugged. “However, that is a completely misguided line of thinking, because if you look carefully, the same mob did the same thing to your holy husband. They stripped his clothes off, whipped him, and made him carry his patibulum to the crucifixion site, as they mocked him for daring to think he were a God. That attempt to debase, to strip one of dignity for daring to be less than mud under their feet, this is a fundamentally satanic urge, and has nothing to do with my gender; only with how they perceived my spiritual and social status”, she answered, still holding the Goddess in her embrace. “They will try to humiliate a woman in a slightly different way than they would a man, but the intent and most of the actions are exactly the same. Also, it would be unjust and hateful to God to blame men as a gender for any of that. Yes, men crucified Christ, but Christ was also a man. Men were dismissive of you, any yet you adore a man. Men tore me apart, and yet other men learned from me every day in the Academy, they were extremely kind and respectful, and when they spoke of me behind my back, they spoke words of praise. It was not women who gave me high status in society, but men. It was not a gender war of any kind, nor was I a poor woman in a men’s world who rose up despite men’s efforts to put me down. No, it was the contrary. My honoured Father taught me mathematics and astronomy, and it was men who supported me, respected me and gave me honour at every turn, while women, in fact, gossiped and gave me nasty looks, trying to make me feel as if something was wrong with me. So, I bear witness to the virtue and goodness of men in my life, as much as I bear witness to the malicious and vile sinfulness of the mob that ended it”, she concluded.

“I wish I had you as my disciple”, nodded Jesus. “You would have brought me and my Father honour, unlike those sectarian satanic miscreants who made me ashamed before you”, he bowed to her again.

“I repeat, you have nothing to be ashamed for, my Lord. Your noble deeds bear testimony to your noble and godly character, as their deeds bear testimony to their own. This is why you are a God, and what they are, I don’t know, but I can’t say that I want any of it in my life, either”, she grinned.

“And likewise, they tried to deprive you of your dignity, and all they did was make it shine even more brightly, my Lady”, Jesus kissed her hand. “For it is not what others do that affects our dignity, but our own actions alone”.

“So, dear Goddess, what would you want to do now?”, Lord Vishnu smiled at the woman.

“My Lord, were it at all possible, I would want to join my husband in his work. I don’t know what qualifications I need to possess, but I am willing to undergo whatever training and education necessary. I find his work to be noble, compassionate and worthy, and a wife must always support her man”, she smiled.

“By all means”, Vishnu nodded, and her Title changed again. “You are in fact vastly overqualified, being a Goddess, having a human experience behind you, and furthermore, being a teacher and a Lady of great insight and discernment, not to speak of your overwhelming wisdom and compassion”, he bowed with great respect, as she blushed again. “Your husband will show you the practical details as you go, but all in all, we are all exceptionally honoured to have you”.

The recent days were eventful, to say the least. Azrael didn’t complain, because it gave him plenty of material for philosophical discussions with his two best friends. Since they just happened to be Gods, those discussions were incredibly deep and satisfying, and he noticed changes in himself. His soul frequency became deeper, and due to karmic benefits of helping distressed souls, he also grew bigger. In fact, he now rivalled the size and colour of Mary of Magdala when she first arrived, and he seriously doubted there was a more advanced angel in heaven. To him, that didn’t mean much. Conversations with Buddha and Zina, however, did.

“Everything changed since Lord Vishnu performed that ritual”, he mused. “And not just Christianity. Have you seen the Neoplatonists, Mahayana Buddhism, and Vedanta? Hindu descriptions of the Gods are sometimes uncanny in their accuracy, when they get it right. There’s a simultaneous breakthrough of philosophies and religions based around transcendental reality that is the One Principle beyond all manifestation, and also ethics based on compassion, kindness and calm acceptance of worldly things. When we compare them to the ethical systems of antiquity, where people thought they will be rewarded by the Gods if they killed more people in more brutal ways and conquered more land, this is astonishing”, he finished.

“Also, the belief that soul survives physical death and continues to have a meaningful existence seems to be spreading, and is no longer limited to Christianity alone, although Christianity has actual evidence”, Buddha noted. “This looks like an anchor that solidified ideas and things that used to be easily dismissible, because the argument for them was essentially ‘it would be terrible if it were otherwise’, and the response would be ‘terrible things happen daily, so, if anything, that is an argument that the most terrible explanation is more likely to be true’. Now, the answer is ‘Christ rose from the dead on the third day’. There are witnesses. It’s a physical fact, not a hypothesis, not an ungrounded Platonic theory”, he added. “Also, the heroic acceptance of death by the Christians, as they were brutally persecuted by the Romans and blamed for whatever the current problem was, added significantly to the credibility of their cause. And also, something else started taking place, that none of us expected. Karmic nucleation catalysed by the increased strength of the transcendental connection”, he looked both pleased and shocked.

“You want to say that ‘blanks’ are growing souls when they hear the enchanting talk about God and the beautiful and immortal Heaven, and participating in acts of love and kindness that seem to be more common”, his wife giggled and kissed his neck. “You intellectuals seem to be working hard on making things hard to understand, because you want to make them general and abstract, and by doing so, nobody understands what you’re talking about anymore”, she pretended to be annoyed.

“It’s not just that”, Buddha ruffled her hair and kissed her hand. “People used to listen to all kinds of stories before, and this didn’t happen. I’m saying that reality is starting to respond at the most basic level, where that world-illusion is based on reality, reality that was first cracked open by Lord Shiva, and then further tilled by Lord Vishnu. As stories resonate with truth, the ‘blanks’ are nucleating and starting to grow real souls. They start primitive, but since human bodies are much smarter than what such primitive souls would normally have access to, they grow into complex structures very quickly, and that seems to accelerate with further incarnations there. There wasn’t enough time to see where this is going, but it’s as if that whole world is growing souls and doing something. It’s hard to tell what the end result will be, but it’s an extremely noteworthy development”, he finished, struggling while his wife was trying to find his ticklish spots to make him laugh.

“So, we will soon be dealing with a completely new soul-type; no longer grown in the astral nursery, or incarnated in a mature form from heaven, or grown from a tear of God or some artefact, but grown on Earth, from the bottom up”, Azrael continued, while those two were both listening very carefully, and fooling around like children, to his great amusement. “Illusory as that world may be, it’s all still taking place within the mind of God, for there indeed is nothing else. And when you’re in the mind of God, God is indeed the most fundamental reality of your existence. If things could grow out of God in heaven, I see no theoretical reason why they could not grow out of God on Earth, as well; the Veil is the same anywhere”.

“And by the way, I love you two, and the way you are acting”, he smiled. “I only wish I had a wife so that I could do something like that with someone. But barring that, watching you two is a great pleasure”, he bowed smilingly.

“She will come”, Zina hugged him. “It would be against God’s nature and Will for it to be any other way”.

“I do hope so”, Azrael nodded and hugged his friend back.

…

“The Christians are starting to become a problem”, Buddha told his angelic friend. “They are turning from a virtuous, transcendentally-bound persecuted minority into a vicious, self-righteous Middle-Eastern monotheistic cult that uses God as if he were their property, and a club they are entitled to use for bashing the ‘infidels’. After a few centuries of persecution and growth, they are now powerful enough to use force as an argument, and since they are philosophically undeveloped, they aren’t really doing well in arguments. Also, other nasty aspects of their faith, inherited from Judaism, are showing their ugly head”, he concluded, lost in thought.

“That is true. However, look at the bright side. Ever since that sheepiest of all sheep, Simon Peter, the sheep have been awakening left and right. It also mobilised incarnated angels, giving them a transcendental tether to which they can attach themselves and focus; it mobilised the incarnated demons, whose proclivity for family life and useful skills and arts has gained a transcendental meaning, and we had more souls that were aware and in good condition, despite their often terrible deaths, than ever. Yes, we always had fanatics and hotheads, and the blessed Lady Kay had to do further splicing of the astral plane in order to accommodate for their specific needs. You can’t put rabid fanatics among the normal souls, and those rabid fanatics are still pretty nice souls overall, just immature and lacking perspective. It would be good if this fanaticism could be mellowed down theologically on the Earth itself, but I’m afraid that’s beyond my pay grade”, smiled the Angel of Death.

“If by ‘fanatics’ and ‘hotheads’ you mean people like those few who called you Satan pretending to be an angel of light in order to lead them astray from the true faith in Jesus Christ the Lord, and God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, making the sign of a cross in front of you and expecting you to be struck by the lightning of God for the blasphemous act of telling them how things actually work, then I both agree with you, and stand in awe of your incredible tolerance and kindness, my friend”, smiled Buddha, as his wife giggled behind him.

“Talking about fanatics and their victims, I think we have incoming”, Zina pointed at the emerging shimmer in space, suddenly serious.

…

Her terror and shock started to subside, once pain was no longer there. The absence of pain was incredibly blissful, and she could see again. That felt wonderful, regaining her eyesight after they cut her eyes out with shards of pottery, which they used to scrape flesh off her bones and tear her to pieces, slowly, torturously, and with bestial glee. Everything happened so chaotically, with such unexpected fury and hatred, that she didn’t even get around to being angry at her murderers. She was just terrified and in pain, losing control of her life, losing her eyesight, and losing life itself in the end. But it didn’t feel like it; it felt like she lost pain, blindness, fear, helplessness and her assailants. Her life was more hers than ever. Her senses were better, her mind was quicker, and the calm bliss she felt appeared to be the baseline of her new reality.

The problem was, it didn’t look possible. Of course, Plato spoke of his analogy with slaves bound in a cave, who perceive mere shadows of the reality outside, but it would be a stretch to think that this could be a description of an actual reality of a soul’s relationship with the physical world, and a greater ideal world beyond. If anything, she thought that she participated in the ideal world through the course of her work on mathematics, astronomy and teaching.

Maybe she is in the process of dying, and this is her dying brain comforting her? Maybe it will all end in mere moments? Regardless, she decided to relish in the experience, for the absence of pain was so luxurious, so peaceful, and there was no mob screaming insane things and most vulgar profanities at her, as they tore her flesh. She shivered at the recollection, and tried to push it away.

At some point, she perceived a change. The space around her felt different, and seemed to solidify in form of a room with three… people? No, they just looked like people, because she could feel profound spiritual light beyond their form. Are they Gods? As she tried to understand who they were, their identities became known to her, as if by some magic. Two were Persons of God, which probably meant they were Gods, but their names were unfamiliar. Definitely not the gods she knew. Also, not The One, although they felt like First Manifestations. She didn’t know how she understood that, but the more she thought of it, the more certain she was; or were they the Final Manifestations? They were extremely holy, and incredibly kind. Also, she knew they were husband and wife. “Plato was right”, she thought.

The third one, the closest, identified as the Angel of Death, and was a wonderful, powerful, incredibly deep being of dark blue and deep purple light, and she intuitively felt that he, because it was a ‘he’, was on the utmost precipice of becoming a God himself, and was a friend of the God-couple. She felt such deep kindness and love between them, that tears instantly welled up and her soul seemingly just exploded from the beauty of their existence, and they didn’t even say a word yet. “Where are my manners”, she thought. “Those are the most beautiful beings, or perfect philosophical entities, I have ever seen, and I haven’t even introduced myself properly”.

“Greetings, honoured Gods. I am Hypatia of Alexandria. Please be kind and patient with me, for I am confused as to the nature of this new reality I found myself in, and I must beg you for explanations and your kind guidance”, she bowed and smiled, in the most dignified way she could manage in her condition.

“Greetings, Lady Hypatia; or, should I rather say, angel Helena?”, Azrael, bowed, as he cleared the veil of memory in her soul. This was usually something he did later on in the process, but the Lady in question was so stunning, so self-possessed, powerful, beautiful and kind, despite her most horrible death, that he treated her more like an equal, and less like a patient.

“Azrael? This is you? I now remember seeing you before, many times. How many lives? Nine? And before, in Heaven? It’s still unclear, but I think more so because I’ve changed, than due to any memory lapse. And you’ve changed as well. You are greater, stronger, kinder, so much kinder and more loving than before. You used to be cold, distant, calm and self-possessed, but now you are amazing, and honestly my heart just flows to you, and I am afraid I might commit some unintended transgression”, she blushed. “And please call me Hypatia. Helena was a caterpillar, whilst I am the butterfly”.

Azrael was stunned, for a reason unlike any in his long experience. He looked at the super-angel in front of him, her deep purple and indigo hues and enormous size, her incredible handling of the situation, and understood that something fatally and irrevocably changed in him.

“My Lady”, he bowed. “Take my hand, and see into my heart”; and they felt each other in earnest.

She was astounded, because as she felt him, his incredibly pure soul, his oceanic mind and his love and admiration for her, her heart responded in ways she never thought possible, for it wasn’t an emotion. The One ripped through the Veil in her heart, and claimed her as himself, and not just an abstract her, but her as a woman who finally met her husband, whom she could worship and adore in the safe knowledge that she was The One who worshipped The One, for they were both persons of God.

And so the words of the Love of God came true, and the Gods were twelve.

Azrael had to leave the Gods to go back to his work, and it always saddened him a bit. He loved the Gods dearly, and he felt most like himself, and most fulfilled, when in their company. Hearing their thoughts and feeling their emotions was like seeing what he, himself wanted to be, and hoped for; only externalised, in form of incredibly lovable beings. He sighed.

The souls that just survived suffering and death, often a terribly excruciating death, needed him, and his work was important.

Besides, two of his work buddies were Gods themselves, and they made his job incredibly fulfilling. He smiled at them, for no particular reason; just that he was happy that they are there.

A soul shimmered in. “My name is Simon Kefa, a disciple of our Lord Yeshua the Christ”, he managed to say. He was obviously distraught by the incredibly torturous death by crucifixion he just experienced, and Azrael immediately felt compassion for the man. However, this was going to be tricky.

“I am Azrael, the Angel of Death and a Judge by the law of God. I am here to answer your questions and help you in any way possible”, the angel bowed to the man.

“Lord Angel, tell me, is my name written in the book of life? Was my life pleasing to the Lord? Am I saved?”, the man stuttered.

“Ah”, sighed Azrael. “I see that you conceptualise God as some combination of perfection, a lawmaker and a ruler, which is typical for the Middle Eastern despotisms. You think that God in his perfection made a perfect Law that he gave to men, your tribe in particular, and there are so many different rules and demands, that one is bound to break some of them, and then God in his perfection will condemn him as lacking”, he smiled.

The man looked confused. “You make it sound as if it weren’t so?”

“Furthermore”, added the Angel of Death, “you think that the role of your teacher Jesus was to pay an infinite, universal price of sacrifice for all who are lacking in some way, but accept his Lordship, so that they can have eternal life with him in Heaven”, he nodded.

“Is it not so?”, Kefa was now completely confused.

“It’s a very strange and unnatural distortion of the truth. It’s not completely unfounded, but no, it is not so”, the angel was serious now. “God is indeed perfection, many different perfections in fact, but God is not unreasonable, or unkind, or cruel; his justice is not what you think it is. If you asked God what his justice was – and I would know – he would tell you that justice is a state where all of Creation manifests all that God is, in his full glory and perfection. Injustice is a state where this is not manifested, or it is hindered, or tampered with. And punishment for not being of God is, well, not being of God. We do, indeed, have a hell, but it is not a place for those who were found lacking. All of creation is filled with beings who are found lacking in some way, and only ten are perfect. No, hell is a place for those who are so cruel, insane and evil, that we would normally destroy them, but we decided to postpone it, because some chance for their redemption might still present itself later in time. You don’t have to fear hell”, Azrael smiled.

The man was hugely relieved. “Thank you, Angel of the Lord”.

“You seem to think that the only alternative to hell is the eternal glory of the Lord”, the angel’s face grew more serious now. “But that goal is so incredibly high, that it consists of far more than merely not being condemned for your rotten nature. No; not being condemned and being perfect are different things altogether. There are many things you would need to understand, and many transformations of spirit you would have to endure, in order to become perfection, of the kind your perfect Lord demanded”, the angel nodded to the man.

“Please, guide me, Angel of God. Show me perfection. Leave me not in darkness and ignorance”, the man bowed sincerely, and Azrael was moved. He looked at his colleagues, they all nodded, and he waved for the man to follow him.

…

Simon Kefa looked around, and saw a place that was not a place, but peace, light, love and fulfilment itself, and his soul rejoiced. Out of the light, a figure appeared, infinitely glorious and beautiful, made of light that was so bright, that the beautiful light of his surroundings was like darkness in comparison, and yet it didn’t hurt his eyes, but filled them with incredible joy and wisdom that radiated from the person. “Lord Yeshua…?” he bowed and asked.

“Close enough”, the person of God spoke with a female voice, to his great confusion.

“You wanted to see what perfection looked like, the perfection your Lord demanded, the perfection of being One with the Lord, in mind, will, nature and body”, the angel bowed. “May I introduce you to my Lady, the hundredfold-worshipped Person of God, Lady Mary of Magdala, the Eternal Wife of Christ”, he bowed again, with a smile of inner bliss welling up.

The man shook as if hit by a whip, in wordless panic and fear., all of his prior confidence crumbling.

“Yes, Kefa, it’s me. The disciple he loved the most, the true Church of Christ. I am glad that we meet again, although I see that you fear that I will take my vengeance upon you now, and that your scheming against me might come with a terrible price”, she grinned mischievously. “Your fears are unfounded. If you can recall, I am not like you and your fellow apostles. I cared only about my Lord, and gave no heed to your pecking order. I did, however, see your disregard of me as disregard of my husband, for he and I are one mind and one flesh, and we have been so since I first lay eyes on him. And you”, she pointed at the man who had shrunken into himself and shivered out of incredible shame and embarrassment, “You did well. You overcame your sectarian prejudice when Paul worked to embrace the ‘heathens’ as well as the Jews. You understood that all those ‘laws’ of yours need to be relaxed because you’re not saved by law, but by Christ. You were strong, indeed as a rock, as my Lord called you”, she nodded in approval. “It is also true that your head was as hard as one, but you actually worked against it, and you also retained a good general direction and provided a good example to the Church”, she continued and looked him straight in the eyes. “I see why Azrael brought you here. He loves me and he remembers the tears I shed as I recalled how you dismissed me, depriving the Church of its soul, and he wanted you to see me now, to show you the truth of your actions, so that you may learn humility. Has he succeeded?”, she asked the shivering man.

“My Lady, I am so sorry”, he sobbed. “I somehow convinced myself that Christ favoured you unjustly, merely because you were his wife, and now I see what you were his wife exactly because you deserved to be held in most favour”, he bowed as he wept. “I was jealous of you, because I couldn’t understand things you and the Lord talked about, and especially as you shared subtle emotions that I could not partake in, and I convinced myself that none of it matters, and that he taught us men everything that actually matters for salvation, and what he had with you are merely things between a husband and a wife”, he blushed in shame. “Please forgive me, because I am merely a foolish fisherman and I was too stupid to know what I was doing”.

“I see you already met my wife, Kefa”, another voice was heard, this time indeed of Christ. “Welcome”, Jesus approached and embraced the trembling man.

“I failed you, my Lord”, the man cried. “I betrayed you once more, and I set your beloved wife aside, instead of having her as our anchor and a source of wisdom. Have I condemned us all?”

“No, Kefa. You did mostly well, but you also made mistakes. Fortunately, my Father in his wisdom accounted for that, and he says it matters not, for if the knowledge I shared with Magdalena was too much for the twelve disciples, it would also be of no use for the wider Church; it is in fact good that the power of Satan was spent on keeping her marginalised, while a simple message was spread far and wide”, he nodded as two more people shimmered in; Goddess Zina and an angel of blue vajra.

“May I introduce apostle Paul”, she smiled as she brought the man forward. “Kefa, I think you owe him some explanations”, she winked and bowed out.

The angelic being couldn’t separate his eyes from Christ and his bride, and after bowing to the former, decided to address the latter.

“My Lady, are you indeed Mary of Magdala?”, Paul asked.

“I am”, the Goddess smiled.

“And you are the beloved wife of our Lord, the disciple he most loved?”, he inquired further.

“That is correct”, Christ interjected, and the Goddess nodded in assent.

“I was told”, and he looked at Peter with eyes that flamed like daggers, “That Mary of Magdala was just some clingy woman who hung along after Christ evicted a herd of demons from her in an exorcism”, his voice was calm but full of righteous fury. “She was even conflated with some repentant prostitute whom the Lord forgave. And now I see the truth, that she is the perfect God, wife of the perfect God”, he bowed to the Lady, and turned back to the man. “Peter, how do you explain this blasphemy?”

“I have no explanation for you, Paul, other than I’m a sinner and a fool”, Kefa trembled. “I was jealous of her, and I convinced myself of what suited my pride. The rumours we spread about her, diminishing her reputation, the way old women gossip and slander, they were lies, and I’m afraid I am guilty of the sin of bearing false testimony, as we all were, for all the apostles shared a jealousy of her and were happy to spread lies”, he cried. “I am truly sorry, for this was truly a terrible thing to do”.

“This explains the strange atmosphere that was in the air every time I asked who the apostle John was, or who the “most beloved disciple” was, or how come John and Mary of Magdala seem to be interchangeable in scripture”, he nodded. “Now it all makes sense”.

“My Lord”, he addressed Jesus, “I don’t feel that it had greatly influenced the message we were spreading among the nations”, he mused. “In fact, if I had to explain Lady Mary and her role, I think it would have complicated things without actually adding anything. I feel she is perfect, and she is what every faithful one of your followers should aspire to become. She loved you, and in that love and in the wisdom you taught her she became perfect. She was loyal to you and reached the end of her race victorious. However, even Peter was loyal and bore his cross with dignity, praising your name. I am not sure this will end as poorly as Peter seems to think”, he scratched his head.

“You are right, wise one. My father told me the same thing. Had Mary assumed primacy in the Church, it wouldn’t have actually helped anything, since the things she knew, and others did not, were in fact beyond anybody’s ability to understand. If the apostles failed to grasp them, everybody else would surely find them beyond their ability as well, which would have in fact made the message more complicated and harder to spread, as you rightly noticed. So, as much as I regret that they had not treated my beloved wife with appropriate dignity and respect, the harm to the Church will be negligible, and you are the person most responsible for this great success, for which I salute you”, Jesus bowed to Paul, who didn’t know where to look out of embarrassment. “The problem Peter caused with this will not interfere with salvation itself, but the whole Church now has his issues with women. This is regrettable, and will cause problems down the line, but other than making women feel they are somehow less than men in the eyes of God, it will also unjustly flatter men, who will assume too much about their primacy”, he waved in disapproval. “From what I can tell, they seem to be turning my mother into some kind of an asexual virgin-mother deity and they think it balances things out”.

“What is to become of me, my Lord?”, trembled Peter. “I have sinned greatly, and I deserve punishment”.

“No, you don’t. You’re an ass, and you caused issues with your obstinacy, but you are otherwise a good man, and the only punishment to you is that you failed to do some good things that would have allowed you to partake in more of God’s glory”, smiled Christ. “You placed limitations on God and in turn you got to be limited, and shared your limitations with others. Go with Azrael now, and learn. He will show you truth, and help you shed your limitations, and spread knowledge to others”, Christ ordered, and Peter bowed out in gratitude.

“As for you, Paul, you are such a pleasant surprise to us”, Jesus turned to the other man. “You never met me in person, and yet you figured it all out better than the disciples who shared bread with me every day, and without you, the message would have died like a flame under a cup. You inflicted such a wound to Satan, that my light will shine through it and keep gnawing at him until his death. Go with Lady Zina; she will tell you more, for there is more”, he concluded as the angelic Paul glowed with his praise, and bowed out as well.

“So, I am to be a repentant demon-ridden former harlot, and your mother is to be forever a virgin”, Magdalena smiled. “What great service have they done for God as a woman”, she waved in dismay.

“Yeah, that is going to be a problem, and it is going to unbalance things, actually harming men more than women”, he confirmed. “However, the upside is more than worth the downside. There is now a justified belief in transcendence of death. It’s no longer a Platonic fantasy that can be easily dismissed. There is understanding than afterlife is better than earthly life, which it is. There is understanding that God demands love, kindness, humility and tolerance, rather than submission and sacrifice of goats and cows. And I think both you and my blessed Mother will somehow survive this human nonsense, as you are rightly adored by all the Gods and angels and other worthy souls, starting with myself”, Christ embraced his smiling Goddess.

“Wait, what?”, his Mother shimmered in. “What was that about the virgin thing?”, she tried to contain herself from bursting into laughter, as Magdalena snickered.

“Father, I’d like to talk to you about the results of my life on Earth”, Lord Jesus addressed Lord Vishnu after the meeting of the Gods took a more relaxed turn, as Mary decompressed and was now chatting vigorously with Lady Zina and Lord Buddha about their Earth experiences, which were both similar and vastly different. It seemed that she got her frustrations out of her system now.

“I see you are distressed over possibility of failure”, nodded Krishna. “You need not be, for you did well”.

“How would I not be distressed, Holy Father? I expected my disciples, of all people, to follow my commandment to love each other as I loved them, and almost instantly after my departure they marginalised my wife, whom I loved the most, who was supposed to be the soul of the Church, the holder of the deepest knowledge, and also so close to me that she was in essence my own flesh. And why? They were jealous, they fought for power, and they edited her out of written testimony so thoroughly, that she will seem like a peripheral figure, and they hinted that “the most beloved disciple” is some fictional guy named John. So, basically, it’s not something that just happened to them by accident. It took premeditation and planning. They removed my wife, who was of one mind and one body with me, and now they are going to do who knows what in my name and with my authority, and I’m afraid Satan is going to adopt, distort and redirect the movement into something that is more useful than harmful to his intentions. And also, I thought my sacrifice would deprive him of his power and authority over that world. That obviously didn’t happen. So, I failed”, he sighed despondently.

“I pretty much expected things to go like this, so be not worried”, Vishnu patted his son’s shoulder. “I would be a poor planner if I planned for absolute success and didn’t account for the Enemy’s efforts. Everything you said is true, and yet it doesn’t matter. Yes, your disciples were influenced by their lower nature, and Satan surely helped, and they marginalised your wife and thus sabotaged the spiritual core of your teaching. That is now lost. However, the teachings never last. The core is always lost within a generation or two after the death of the founder. So, the loss of the spiritual teaching is the least of my worries, as it was destined to happen within a century. Also, complex, sophisticated teachings are the least effective there, because they assume a target audience that doesn’t exist; essentially, if Mary had knowledge that only she managed to grasp, and your other students didn’t, what are the odds that someone from an even wider circle would have benefited from it?”, he asked rhetorically, and Jesus didn’t answer.

“Exactly”, Vishnu nodded. “So the teachings are more less useless. However, since you put so much effort into teaching her, Sanat Kumar thought she was the prime target and invested huge efforts into neutralising her completely. Also, since he had more holes than plugs, he needed to leave most of it open, which meant other students, whom he deemed harmless due to their previously demonstrated cowardice and propensity for succumbing to societal indoctrination and habit. Also, he thought students will try to cover up the fact that you were crucified because it’s the most shameful death, and you don’t want to brag with your supposed Messiah being crucified by the Romans. He also ignored everyone from the outer circles. Which means he ignored Saul of Tarsus, the persecutor of the Church, and he ignored the apostles, thinking they are measly cowards who will keep to themselves and possibly preach to a few Jews, which will come to a bad end because the Jews fear Roman persecution over supposed Messiahs. Which is how we win”, he winked at Jesus, who still didn’t understand it

“Kid, think”, his mother interjected. “Kefa and others will have a seriously guilty conscience over what they did to Magdalena. It’s not a small thing. They will fear your anger and punishment after death, and Kefa especially fears it because he trice betrayed you already, and this is now strike four. They will not cower in some basement now. Also, we need someone outside of that circle, who is actually capable of spreading the message, someone smart, eloquent, heard-headed and fanatical, convincing and educated. Father gave a vision to Saul the Persecutor, and he had a spiritual conversion, that will make him into the most ardent and fanatical spreader of the news about your crucifixion and resurrection, literally making the whole world know, and he’s theologically so much better than those shepherds, tax collectors and fishermen you taught, it’s not even funny. He’s one of the young bright hopes of the Sanhedrin, and he also has fire under his butt because he persecuted the Church and fears divine punishment if he slacks, so he’ll throw himself into the jaws of death for you. So, essentially, Sanat Kumar spent his resources neutralising Magdalena who would have sat in some hut and taught a mystical teaching to dozens of people over her lifetime, and opened himself to dozens of highly motivated people who are mostly dumb as rocks, but who will now be organised and prodded into forming a universal theology, not just a Jewish sect that worships death of a descendant of David, that only a handful of Jews would care for, but spreads good news that Death does not reign supreme”, she smiled and rubbed her son’s shoulder.

“Oh”, said Jesus. “So you really thought this through”, he smiled. “Did I even make any damage to Satan? I’m afraid that part failed completely”, he mused.

“The problem with testing your hypothesis by getting yourself killed is that you can’t try something else if you fail”, answered Vishnu. “And yes, he is still in charge there. But he had to cede ground in order to save himself from repercussions of torturing and killing you. All who follow you out will be allowed to do so. However, he will of course do his worst to obfuscate things to the point where the very idea of who you are will be so vague or polluted, that this will be a hard thing to do. But it doesn’t matter, because you rose from the dead on the third day. The witnesses saw you, and they are spreading the good news. The concept of soul outliving the body, and there being another, better world in the afterlife, combined with the bright highway of light you carved into that world, is the only thing that matters to me. As far as that is concerned, everything was a resounding success, and people down there now have a reasonable hope in place where there used to be only despair”, he concluded.

“We must not become complacent, though”, Lakshmi added. “The Enemy will be working. Sabotage the message. Introduce similar-sounding but spiritually vacuous alternatives. Blame your followers for all kinds of disasters and persecute them. Spread slander. Incite your followers to commit abominable acts. Based on what we’ve seen so far, this is certainty rather than conjecture. We can also expect attacks from unknown directions, which are hard to account for since they are unknown; basically, he didn’t think of them yet, but we expect that he will. This is not a fight we expected to win now. It would be sweet if we did, but we are not so optimistic as to count on it. But, you scored a big hit and it will count”, she finished.

“No way!”, Zina shouted in shock.

“But I see now that it is true”, she recovered and turned inwards to look.

“You were Mandragora the demoness. We called you the poisonweed. But I still can’t believe it. You are the most amazing person; when you came from Earth you were even more impressive than my husband the Buddha, and he was the most impressive person who ever came from there; the most pure, wise and aware”, she fumbled words in shock.

“Look who’s talking”, smiled Lord Shiva, and ruffled her hair as she started smiling. “The Love of God herself”, and everybody gasped, as Zina’s title changed and she blushed so hard she was almost purple, and silently and worshipfully kissed Shiva’s hand as her tears welled up.

Mary’s eyes glistened with tears, as she smiled and nodded. “Indeed, that used to be my name. I had many incarnations on Earth since; this was my seventh, and Lord cast all those seven demons out of me as he opened my eyes to God’s light”, she turned to look at her husband adoringly. “I can’t say those lives were what you would call demonic. I had families, I learned to love, to nurture and care, and it changed me, but I was completely Earth-bound. I was so intoxicated with the idea of family life that I kept returning to relive it again, and I was a young woman in this last life when I joined the people who listened to John the Baptist. It changed something within me, as I started feeling that there’s something more to the world, to life, to reality, than just having a family and obeying commandments and customs diligently”, she reminisced, and looked into distance.

“And then he came”, she gripped the arm of Christ firmly. “One look at him, and my soul was filled with such light, such reality, truth and meaning, that everything demonic left me forever, and I cast away my old name. I followed him ever since, and loved him with my entire soul. We were married in Cana of Galilee, where his blessed Mother annoyed him into miraculously making more wine, as it was the duty of the groom”, she smiled, as Lakshmi smilingly bowed and mouthed “guilty as charged”.

“She was my most advanced, most beloved disciple”, Jesus continued. “She intuitively grasped the meaning of everything I taught, and spiritually progressed at an exponential pace, which caused some jealousy from my other disciples”, he grinned. “I had to remind them to be respectful more than once”.

“You don’t know how it feels to be here, what it’s like for me, Adonai”, her tears started streaming down her face. “This is heaven. I mean of course it is, but you don’t know what it was like when you were gone. Kefa and others summarily dismissed me and basically sent me to the kitchen with other women. They didn’t want to hear anything I had to say, as if I were a creature somewhat smarter than a goat, but nowhere near a man. I couldn’t believe that those were the people who were with you, who saw how you treated me and other women, who saw that you looked at each person as a person, and individual, and not a category or a class”, she continued sobbing. “They didn’t even try to make me feel less because I was a woman; they just assumed it as if it were an absolute truth. I felt such injustice. Not because I was a woman, because I loved being a woman. With you, it was everything I could ever dream of. But they thought I would have taken the leadership of the Church after you were gone, and they felt as if it were an abomination for a woman to lead, so they completely marginalised me. I never wanted to lead anything or compete with men, so I felt it as a grave injustice. I just wanted to be asked about you, so that I could relish in the memories, but nobody cared. It was as if they thought there was nothing of consequence I could possibly know, being a mere woman. Initially, I felt terribly disrespected and humiliated, and angry because of the injustice, but soon I got my senses together and started meditating on you, reliving the memories, thinking about your teachings, going back to the details of how your consciousness felt when you were the presence of God. I worked on purifying my emotions, thoughts and actions. I attained multiple initiations and spiritual experiences, and I continued meditating until my body crumbled from under me and I returned to you”, she smiled through tears.

“And you can’t even imagine how it feels for me here”, she smiled more brightly. “I was greeted by the honoured angel Azrael, and the precious Goddess at his side, Zina the Love of God, and the first thing I felt here was being truly seen for what I am as a person. They saw my naked soul in its truth, and talked to it directly. I felt seen, acknowledged, listened to, understood and loved. It was as if I was in your presence again, Adonai”, she leaned into her husband’s side.

“And then I saw the rest of the women and men of God here, and what most shocked me was how natural and free they all were in their mutual respect, how they saw each other and how recognition flowed naturally as worship, respect and love, without inhibitions, and how the women are lovely and feminine, how men are powerful and masculine, and they absolutely and unconditionally adore each other with their entire being, and my heart just bursts with happiness at the sight. Being among them is everything I would ever have wished for, had I known enough to be able to dream of such wonder”, she choked on words, as Zina and Kay rushed to embrace her.

“Most worshipped and respected Goddess, I bow to you, again and again”, spoke the Angel of Death. “I have seen many things, wonderful and terrible alike. I spent eons in Heaven, surrounded by my own kind, the spirit-crystals of vajra. I was there when the first souls started arriving from that hellhole they call Earth, where Satan rules supreme, and I saw Gods and Goddesses in tears and shock, as the souls insane from trauma retold their tragedies, and I saw lady Zina dying from pain on the floor. I saw the most holy mother of your Lord in tears as she tried to console the sobbing Light of God who gave birth to Time and Space, the most terrifying and powerful Lady Shakti. I saw the terrible and awesome Lord Shiva in tears, and I saw his power set loose in anger as he cracked the world and killed the fool responsible for this tragedy, planting the tears of the Gods in the foundations of Earth, which is how the mother of your Lord was conceived. I saw corrupted angels speaking horrible blasphemies, and I saw the blessed Lord Buddha appear before me as the purest, brightest crystal of blue vajra straight from the Earth, without any adaptation, addressing me and the blessed Lady Zina with full awareness and knowledge; and I’ve seen them both becoming Gods within hours. However, seeing you arrive today is the most impressive thing I have ever seen”, he bowed deeply. “Had you been in Heaven where I spent most of my long life, you would have scraped at its ceiling, as the most powerful, purest and the most subtle, gentle and fearsome being there. You were so close to godhood, that you indeed achieved it within minutes from arriving. I don’t know which is more awe-inspiring; your kindness, your intelligence or your power. I don’t wish to offend anyone, but people who marginalised you and treated you as anything less than the most awesome angelic being in existence, are at a great loss, and they are to be pitied”, he bowed to her again, as she smiled at him angelically and tried to bow, as much as it were possible, with everybody hugging her.

Zina knelt at Mary’s side and took her face in her hands, looking straight in her eyes. “Sister, I was never a very intellectual person when I was human, so I was never in your position; the usual female role in our culture gave me everything I wanted. But I can imagine what it would have felt like for my husband, were he a woman-buddha trying to get people to listen, and I see you and your frustration and pain. I am so sorry you had to experience that”, Zina kissed her sister’s forehead and touched it with her own.

Her husband sat down as well. “Don’t sell yourself short, my Lady, for you are the first person ever to beat me in an argument, and so thoroughly that I accepted you as my guru and begged for your guidance, and became a God at your side when I worshipped your wisdom”, he gently moved a lock of hair that was in front of his wife’s eye.

“This”, Mary both sobbed more powerfully and smiled like a sun. “This is heaven. Let me just stay here and experience this forever and I will wish for nothing else”, she looked at the two of them. “The way the two of you see and treat each other, is heaven”.

“Jesus, bro, what the fuck have you been teaching your disciples there, man?”, Azazel looked at the Christ with mock consternation.

“I don’t think mine were that much better, either”, Buddha added, scratching his head in slight embarrassment.

“He tried”, Mary defended her true love. “He taught by example, he warned, but it is as if some things are so profoundly culturally ingrained, people just assume them. People assume women are stupid, especially if they are beautiful, and especially if they are feminine, and I was both”, she recalled.

“I fail to see how that follows from anything”, Kay looked shocked. “Beauty, femininity and mental capacity are three completely independent variables”.

Mary started laughing so hard that she stopped crying. “Thank you for this, sister. For being such a crown proof of their foolishness, as you embody everything those men would consider impossible; for in you, all three of those variables are converging into infinity, and yet you exist here, as the most real and wonderful comfort to me”, she smiled and caressed the beautiful, feminine face of God’s Mind.